used brain for sale

Camille Paglia, in her chapter on Emily Dickinson in her book Sexual Personae notes that Miss Emily uses the word "brain" in some unusual ways. Unfortunately, I have used the pages of Paglia's book to roll big fat joints which I enjoyed several times a day while enjoying my ECE (Extended Cannabis Episode).

Of course some of you may not realize I'm joking. No, I don't smoke marijuana because it inspires me to prepare gourmet meals in the wee hours of the morning. Or failing that, it alters a mind that is already permanently altered, and that's not necessary.

But I wanted to remark on Dickinson's usage of the word brain. It's not a very feminine word. Neither, or course, is "fart" --- the two together are deadly. I don't picture the average slim blonde cheerleader using the term "brain-fart." I'm neither slim nor blonde, but that is the first time I've ever used that term. A boyfriend introduced it to me, one of my creepiest boyfriends, I should add. He would wash his hair: the first day he looked great, the second day OK. The third day, the baseball cap would appear on his head. As the days went by, the hair sticking out in back would come more and more to resemble a waterfall --- no, not the right color for a waterfall, but the right degress of "moistness." And this guy was always
talking about "brain-farts." I thought it was the tackiest, most tasteless thing I'd heard anyone say since another of my creepy boyfriends (I had a string of them in the mid-nineties) spoke of how he was "dyin' to NAIL me." Let it not be thought these were long-term partnerships.

I can't find the poems Paglia has quoted, nor can I find Paglia's book. Oh, well.

There's a joke my mom told me about brains. Something about a college president's brain, a dean's brain, a department chair's brain, and on and on to a graduate student's brain. It's too bad I can't remember the punch line.

My own brain is of course no good anymore, after being bent out of shape to produce the most bent out of shape ECE anyone could imagine. So I'm not going to for example spend five or six paragraphs on the philosophical debate about whether the brain and the mind are the same thing. I've read books on the subject, that's another reason my brain doesn't work anymore,
and I've lost the last trace of my mind.

I have to let my tomcat out of solitary. To all bloggers: happy happy joy joy.

---Harriet.